Jimmy Kimmel: Hillary Clinton Conspiracy Theories Would Be Harder to Believe If They Didn’t Actually Come True (VIDEO)

Kimmel: Clinton Conspiracy Theories Would Be Harder to Believe If They Didn’t Actually Come True ...

As I have always said, humor is truly funny when there is truth to it. As Kimmel opined, hard to call it a conspiracy theory when it actually happens. He went on to joke that “maybe Hillary Clinton had a few too many shots of Trump Vodka the night before.” Folks, the slurred speech is not alcohol, its when she is over-medicated for what ever the neurological disorder is that she is keeping from the American people.

As reported by William Teach at RWN, the American people are not buying Hillary’s latest lie of pneumonia.

RCP: From Kimmel’s monologue on the Monday night broadcast of Jimmy Kimmel Live:

JIMMY KIMMEL: Hillary Clinton was supposed to be in California today… but she had to cancel the trip because of illness. You probably know Hillary was coughing a lot in public last week and then yesterday she was forced to leave a 9/11 memorial because she was feeling faint. Turns out on Friday Clinton’s doctor had diagnosed her with pneumonia but they kept it secret until this happened and they were forced to admit it. You know, these conspiracy theories about Hillary Clinton’s health would be a lot harder to believe if they didn’t actually come true.

Or maybe, just maybe, there’s another story here. Let’s run the video where she had to be helped into the van. You probably saw this on the news… We see she’s being kind of supported by one of her handlers there. And then she stumbles a little bit and then Secret Service has to kind of put her into the van.They even get between her and the news cameras. But I tell you, maybe Hillary Clinton doesn’t have pneumonia, maybe Hillary Clinton had a few too many shots of Trump Vodka the night before.

It is kind of funny that the people who don’t think Hillary Clinton is fit and healthy enough to be president are so worried that Hillary Clinton is fit and healthy enough to be president.

Gene Wilder, Star of ‘Willy Wonka’ & ‘Yound Frankenstein’ Dies at 83

WHAT A SAD, SAD DAY THAT WE HAVE LOST ONE OF OUR COMEDIC ICONS … YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN IS THE BEST COMEDY MOVIE EVER!!!

Gene Wilder has passed away at the age of 83  from complications from Alzheimer’s and we are a sadder world because of it. He was one of my all-time favorites. Wilder brought us so many laughs from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory to Young Frankenstein to Blazing Saddles to Stir Crazy to one of his lesser known buy hysterical hits, The Adventure of Sherlock Holmes’ Smarter Brother. In the 1970′s and 1980′s there was no one any funnier. Put together director Mel Brooks, Gene Wilder, Richard Prior and Marty Feldman and you get comedic genius. Our loss is Heavens gain as Gene Wilder can now be reunited with for Gilda Radner

Gene Wilder, who regularly stole the show in such comedic gems as “The Producers,” “Blazing Saddles,” “Young Frankenstein,” “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory” and “Stir Crazy,” died Monday at his home in Stamford, Conn. His nephew Jordan Walker-Pearlman said he died of complications from Alzheimer’s disease. He was 83.

His nephew said in a statement, “We understand for all the emotional and physical challenges this situation presented we have been among the lucky ones — this illness-pirate, unlike in so many cases, never stole his ability to recognize those that were closest to him, nor took command of his central-gentle-life affirming core personality. The decision to wait until this time to disclose his condition wasn’t vanity, but more so that the countless young children that would smile or call out to him “there’s Willy Wonka,” would not have to be then exposed to an adult referencing illness or trouble and causing delight to travel to worry, disappointment or confusion. He simply couldn’t bear the idea of one less smile in the world.

Quotes from Young Frankenstein that i still use to this day:

[Froederick and Igor are exhuming a dead criminal]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What a filthy job.
Igor: Could be worse.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: How?
Igor: Could be raining.
[it starts to pour]

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [to Igor] Now that brain that you gave me. Was it Hans Delbruck’s?
Igor: [pause, then] No.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Ah! Very good. Would you mind telling me whose brain I DID put in?
Igor: Then you won’t be angry?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: I will NOT be angry.
Igor: Abby someone.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [pause, then] Abby someone. Abby who?
Igor: Abby… Normal.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [pause, then] Abby Normal?
Igor: I’m almost sure that was the name.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [chuckles, then] Are you saying that I put an abnormal brain into a seven and a half foot long, fifty-four inch wide GORILLA?
[grabs Igor and starts throttling him]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Is that what you’re telling me?

Gene Wilder

Gene Wilder & Gilda Radner – Reunited again

New York Times Obit: Gene Wilder Dies at 83; Star of ‘Willy Wonka’ and ‘Young Frankenstein’.

 Mr. Wilder’s rule for comedy was simple: Don’t try to make it funny; try to make it real. “I’m an actor, not a clown,” he said more than once.

With his haunted blue eyes and an empathy born of his own history of psychic distress, he aspired to touch audiences much as Charlie Chaplin had. The Chaplin film “City Lights,” he said, had “made the biggest impression on me as an actor; it was funny, then sad, then both at the same time.”

Mr. Wilder was an accomplished stage actor as well as a screenwriter, a novelist and the director of four movies in which he starred. (He directed, he once said, “in order to protect what I wrote, which I wrote in order to act.”) But he was best known for playing roles on the big screen that might have been ripped from the pages of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.

He was nominated for a Golden Globe for his performance as the wizardly title character in “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory” (1971). The film was a box-office disappointment, partly because of parental concern that the moral of Roald Dahl’s story — that greedy, gluttonous children should not go unpunished — was too dark in the telling. But it went on to gain a devoted following, and Willy Wonka remains one of the roles with which Mr. Wilder is most closely identified.

In “Blazing Saddles,” a raunchy, no-holds-barred spoof of Hollywood westerns, Mr. Wilder had the relatively quiet role of the Waco Kid, a boozy ex-gunfighter who helps an improbable black sheriff (Cleavon Little) save a town from railroad barons and venal politicians. The film’s once-daring humor may have lost some of its edge over the years, but Mr. Wilder’s next Brooks film, “Young Frankenstein,” has never grown old.

Mr. Wilder himself hatched the idea, envisioning a black-and-white film faithful to the look of the Boris Karloff “Frankenstein,” down to the laboratory equipment, but played for laughs rather than for horror. He would portray an American man of science, the grandson of the infamous Dr. Frankenstein, who tries to turn his back on his heritage (“that’s Frahn-kahn-STEEN”) but finds himself irresistibly drawn to Transylvania to duplicate his grandfather’s creation of a monster in a spooky mountaintop laboratory.

Daily Commentary – Tuesday, August 9, 2016 – 90 Year Old Nicholas Salerno Tells Cops Hooker Ripped Him Off

  • When told he could face criminal charges for hiring a hooker, he said “I don’t give a f***. I’m 90 years old for Christ’s sake.”

Daily Commentary – Tuesday, August 9, 2016 | Download

Barack Obama Jokes About SCOTUS Scalia’s Death, While Not Even Attending Funeral (VIDEO)

The Comedian in Chief strikes again … WHAT A SICK, SICK, SOB.

What a small, small man you are. So Barack Hussein Obama can’t seem to find the time or the class to attend the late Justice Antonin Scalia’s funeral, but he can find the time to joke about the justice’s untimely death. Obama did so on February 22, 2016,  as he delivered remarks to the National Governors Association at the White House. What’s worse, not only did this poor excuse for a president and human make the sick and pathetic joke, there were those in the room that laughed. REALLY? So this is what is funny to Obama. What a sick individual this man truly is. Never have we had such a divisive president hold the office. You will be judged one day Mr. President, and you will have a lot of explaining.

Is it any wonder why this country is as divided as it is with a president who would make such a joke? And you wonder Barack why you will never nominate a justice SCOTUS.

Just curious, what do you think the reaction would be if a Democrat president passed away in office whose name sounds like Barry Soetoro and a Republican leader made a joke about the succession of power? Yeah, that’s what I thought it would be.

The most classless president ever to hold the Office … Thanks America!

Classless … Barack Obama Jokes with Jon Stewart on Daily Show About Iran Nuclear Deal

REALLY, HOW IS DISCUSSING A NUCLEAR IRAN A JOKING MATTER?

The Comedian in Chief is at it again … How sad is it that Barack Obama is only comfortable going on a comedy show to discuss life and death matters like arming Iran with nukes? It is pathetic that a president is allowed to go on a non-serious show with such important topics and lie through his teeth about this lousy deal with Iran. To make matters worse, its not like Stewart is going to confront him on his lies, instead Stewart just makes a joke about it because after all, its a comedy show.  How is allowing a radical Islamic, state sponsor of terror country like Iran a laughing matter.

President Barack Obama used a playful environment Tuesday to hit his critics on the Iran nuclear deal.

He said that critics of the deal apparently think, “if you had brought Dick Cheney to the negotiations, everything would be fine,” according to the White House press pool report.

Check out the 6:05 mark of the VIDEO where Jon Stewart may have gotten in the zinger of the night in a not so subtle way as Obama takes a breathe and thinks to himself, its good that he is on my side. Obama says of Iran, “But with respect to Iran, look this is an adversary. They are anti-American, anti-Israel, anti-Semitic, they sponsor terrorist organizations like Hezbollah. Jon Stewart mockingly replies, “Sounds like a good partner for peace” and then basically laughs in the president’s face. Honestly, that is the Iran nuclear deal in a nutshell. It is no laughing matter that Obama has provided a legal pathway to a nuclear bomb to Iran and yet one just shakes their head as this terrible, terrible and dangerous deal.

Jon Stewart Talks with Obama for One Last Time

Next Page →

Support Scared Monkeys! make a donation.

 
 
  • NEWS (breaking news alerts or news tips)
  • Red (comments)
  • Dugga (technical issues)
  • Dana (radio show comments)
  • Klaasend (blog and forum issues)
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Close
E-mail It