“Dumb, Dumber and Dumbest” … Two Naked Men & Their Underwear-Clad Accomplice Rob Bonita Beach, FL Restaurant … WHERE’S THE BEEF?

The Beefcake Bandits …

Three college age men, two completely nude, one just wearing his tidy-whites robbed Doc’s Beach House, not of any money, but of beef. You just can’t make this stuff up. The bandits in the buff robbed the restaurant at 3:06 a.m. Sunday, stealing 60 hamburgers, three pounds of bacon, three red peppers and a paddleboard. Why would one suspect that alcohol or drugs were involved in this crime? How do we know it was exactly 3:06 AM on Sunday, why the restaurant had a security camera of course. Actually, Doc’s Beach House had multiple security cameras that got the trio in a frame by frame account of their caper.

The Beefcake Bandits … Photo: Southwest Florida Crime Stoppers

Why would three naked “knuckleheads” break into a Bonita Beach eatery and only steal food as two security cameras captured their every move?

“Dumb, dumber and dumbest,” Sansevieri said with a laugh Wednesday.

Three days after the naked caper heard around Southwest Florida, the bare-naked beef bandits remained on the lam. Authorities don’t know if the men are tourists or residents, but are trying to uncover and bare all tips. On Wednesday, authorities released photos — at least those that can be printed — to ask the public for help in identifying the men. The bandits robbed the restaurant at 3:06 a.m. Sunday, stealing 60 hamburgers, three pounds of bacon, three red peppers and a paddleboard.

In addition to the restaurant security footage and 200 frame-by-frame photos, the bandits left another clue: a trail of red peppers on the beach. On Sunday morning, Doc’s kitchen staff found the restaurant’s red peppers about 100 yards away near a beach bathhouse.

“They left a trail like Hansel and Gretel,” Doc’s waitress Shelly Isom said with a laugh. “One of them probably said after, ‘Uh, guys, where did we leave our clothes?’”

WHERE’S THE BEEF?

Anyone with information on the identities and whereabouts of the suspects is asked to call Crime Stoppers at 1-800-780-TIPS (8477). Bangert believes the men will be caught because of the media attention.