RSSPorn Industry Seeks Federal Bail Out Assistance … Fed $’s, the New Viagra … Porn on Hard Times?
Some stories just write themselves.
Only in America … from the satirical truth is stranger than fiction category comes the 
Porn industry asking why they can’t get federal bail out money as well. Hustler’s Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry.
Have the profits gone soft in the adult entertainment world, or is this just and effort on Flynt’s part to get a piece of the American “bailout” pie? Larry Flynt has always been a master of satire, as repulsing as he may be, but talk about hitting a home run to show just ridiculous and selective government has been in choosing he they will bail out and who they will not. As the Q and O states, “this gives ‘too big to fail’ an entirely new meaning”.
Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said Wednesday they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry.
“The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three,” said Owen Moogan, spokesman for Larry Flynt. “The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine.”
Francis said in a statement that “the US government should actively support the adult industry’s survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people.”
As Hot Air claims. who knew the oldest profession was not recession proof? Has the adult entertainment industry really fallen upon hard times? Are the profits down, one might ask even limp? Flynt admits DVD sales are down; however, the porn industry in general is fine. The real issue according to Larry Flynt seems to be that the depression caused by the bad economy is causing people not to have sex. Flynt is never at a loss to take a jab at government; however, if only Bill Clinton were still in office maybe he may have just gotten his request.
Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow.
But the industry leaders said the issue is a nation in need. “People are too depressed to be sexually active,” Flynt said in the statement. “This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex.”
The following is the full press release from Larry Flynt.
Posted January 8, 2009 by Scared Monkeys Bizarre, Business, Economy, Fun, Government, Humor, Politics, WTF | 19 comments |
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19 Responses to “Porn Industry Seeks Federal Bail Out Assistance … Fed $’s, the New Viagra … Porn on Hard Times?”
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Flynt is a real dirt bag but boy does he make a point and nail the politicians.
Why not bail everyone out?
LOL, as Flynt said …. who else to go to and get a bail out of the sex industry than the very individuals who have been screwing Americans for years.
R
as little as i think of larry flynt, he’s sure scraping the bottom of the barrel for comrades when he chooses weepy, wimpy, sexual predator joe francis.
you’re probably right about flynt’s chances being better with clinton although we can never be sure about obama’s propensities since he’s totally insulated against criticism for anything by msm.
dennisintn
Flynt is as low as it gets. however, he is spot on in his satire of the bail out.
Gee, what does that tell us about out govt? Sad.
R
There is nothing wrong with Larry Flint !!! He sticks up for freedom of speach !!! Plus he hates Jerry Fartwell. Here is a better news story http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090108/ap_on_re_us/internet_suicide
Lori Drew is trying to get her charges reversed
Cant help but wonder if Larry Flint has alterative motives, What does Larry have up his sleeve ???
I have an idea….auction off Larry and Joe on ebay to help the porn industry!!! I would like to buy Joe and put him to work doing physical labor like so many have to do and let him do it 12 hours a day for a few years!!! I think it would make a real man out of him.
#6- Bun— Excellent idea. Problem with the whiner Joe is he would probably recruit more 16 yr. old girls to do the job for him and snap pictures of their booties in the process.
Larry Flint is the lowest of low- but also agree that he is calling out the Government at a time when they have so much internally to fix in addition to the whole other mess this country is in.
Buster—figures you would hold Flint in high regard. I think you are one of the most blatantly SEXIST men who posts on here and isn’t shy about that overt sexism either. To each his own I guess.
NG from Boston
ANewGirl thanks to people like larry flint you are entitled to your opinion and have freedom of speech
“What does Larry have up his sleeve?”
Funny place to keep it ….
Anyway, maybe Larry Flynt is the GM of the porn industry … there’s still demand and consumption out there, but perhaps the more agile competitors, the current entrepreneurial types, are … well … beating the pants off him.
God bless free enterprise!
One good thing about this story … it can make the speech of our journalists and politicians more colorful.
Now, instead of the dreary talk about the need for federal cash infusions, etc., we’ll be hearing that the economy needs a good dose of Viagra.
(Or would that be sexist?)
Look for a rally in Pfizer’s stock.
joe francis needs to be strung up by his balls (if he indeed has any…). flint is sitting just where he deserves to be. making money off others. nothing but pimps.
i do see the irony in it all & can just picture dems giving every cent of the funds requested. free speech & all…
New Girl…lol…you are probably right that Joe would have underage teens to do his hard labor. He should be slapped and sterilized!
“Is that a bailout in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”
Hustler is clearly too big to fail. If they go down, the domestic porn industry might stop going down, and that would be tragic.
But the Girls Gone Wild Dude shouldn’t get a bailout. GGW has put out limp, unimaginative product for years now, and their business model is clearly inferior to the stiff competitive set in this market.
Porn Czar? Congress can then have proper oversight over this critical industry. I have a few candidates in mind….politicians who know what a good screwing looks like.
Makes sense since clearly Congress is using its blood-engorged penis to violate America in the colon while not even offering to manually stimulate America’s penis.
I was expecting the call girl business to ask for bailout too to help the politicians and congress perverts to keep them in young girls for old men.
#7 Buster—while that may be true….Flint’s morals leave much to be desired. I do agree he is a colorful character. Let’s not forget we are allowed Freedom of Speech in our First Amendment Right’s so Porn Czar Larry gets no credit for that.
#10 – Richard- Pfizer… (Laughing) that’s just funny, not sexist. We are afterall talking about adult entertainment here, not for the weak of heart.
Each year, Las Vegas hosts the Adult Video Awards..sometimes they show a few clips on TV of winners….now there’s a group of loonies for you. Actually watched an HBO special once following a year in the life of a young woman who got in to the business…it’s not glamourus at all..quite dangerous, in fact. Most wind up drug users and dependent on all the wrong things in this life…kind of sad, but hey—you reap what you sew when you make bad career choices like that.
Government “Bail-Out” will be the 21st Century’s new term vs. the “Buy-Out”, “Merger & Acquisition” phase of late 90′s – 2007/8. Big problem there since every industry in America will have their hands out and where the hell do people think this money is coming from? Oh, that’s right…the Golden Boy is going to pick up his special Red Emergency phone & just order the US Mint/Treasury to keep printing more? Oh, I feel much better now.
YoYo Muffintop….lol…I think you’ve finally connected with my weird sense of humor…we’re all getting a good rear approach scr*w from our government again!!!
#16, Bun…The day YoYo finally connects is when it’s time to take out the Jose Cuervo 1800 & hit it hard. We’ll have to be inebriated enough for it to finally make any sense.
Yep, as Americans we do have to keep on asking how many times are we supposed to bend over and, well…we all know how that finishes.
You know, New Girl, when things are going wrong and not sure which decision to make, everyone starts making sense, except me!!! Get the bottle opener ready!!
#18-Bun—-bottle opener on stand-by, fresh supply of lemons, limes and plenty of salt or sugar…whatever suits your fancy.
=) NG from Boston