Shocking News: Florida Police Find that Tiger Woods Responsible for his Single Person SUV Accident … However New Woman Claims Affair

It what might have been one of the most “Onionesque” press conferences ever, the Florida Highway Patrol presser stating that Tiger Woods was at fault for the single vehicle accident that took place at 2:25 am Friday had to be one of the most bizarre events ever.

Out of curiosity, who else would have been responsible, the chipmunk that darted across the driveway? Maybe blame the fire hydrant for having the audacity to being located in that very spot where Wood’s SUV veered off the road. What made this presser even more comical was all the eyes of the media and the gossip rags were on hand thinking some how that Tiger and his wife Elin Nordegren would some how be hand cuffed, arrested, made to do a perp walk.

The media was expecting a Law & Order gotcha moment and instead received a Spinal Tap moment of this is what they wantes, this is what they got.

Since the accident, tabloids and gossip Web sites have fueled speculation about the events leading up to it, including that there may have been a domestic dispute between Woods and his wife.

The crash came two days after The National Enquirer published a story alleging that Woods had been seeing a New York nightclub hostess, and that they recently were together in Melbourne, where Woods competed in the Australian Masters. The woman, Rachel Uchitel, denies the affair.

An attorney for the neighbors who dialed 911 after the crash said Woods did not appear to be driving under the influence and showed no signs of having been in a fight. Montes said there were no claims of domestic violence and insufficient evidence to subpoena any medical information.

“Despite the celebrity status of Mr. Woods, the Florida Highway Patrol has completed its investigation in the same professional manner it strives to complete each traffic investigation,” Montes said.

Tiger Woods was cited for careless driving, faces a $164 fine and four points on his driver’s license. Let’s hope Tiger can afford the fine. So does this mean the end of the Tiger Woods saga? Does not look like it as another woman has come out of the “wood” work, 24 year old Jaime Grubbs claims to have had a 31 month affair with Tiger Woods.

Grubbs claims she has text messages … pic & text below.

My 2-year fling with Tiger (pic is exclusive, please use link to see the latest to claim an affair with Woods)

Tiger is said to have messaged Jaimee just three days before the crash warning: “My wife has been through my phone and may be calling you.”

Jaimee says the golf champion ordered her to delete her name from her voicemail because his other half was checking his phone records.

Jaimee says the superstar said: “Hey, it’s Tiger. I need you to do me a huge favour. Can you please take your name off your phone? My wife went through my phone and may be calling you. So if you can, please take your name off that.

“Just have it as a number on the voicemail. You got to do this for me. Huge. Quickly. Bye.”

UPDATE I: RUT-ROH, Tiger Woods Apoligizes for Trangressions & Personal Failings

Tiger Woods disclosed his “personal failings” in a 317-word statement on his Web site that did not delve into details, except to say that he “let my family down” and regrets it “with all of my heart.”

Still to be determined is whether this closes a shocking saga involving one of the biggest names in sport.

In the last week, Woods has faced intense media scrutiny after a car accident outside his home in the middle of the night and sordid allegations of affairs. Finally, on Wednesday, Woods acknowledged he had “not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves.”